Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
