Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
