I feel like abortions should bother me more
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Randomize
