You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
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