i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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