I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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