Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
Randomize
