Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
