Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
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