I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
