That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
Don't make out with my wife yet
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
You are a genius and a whore.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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