had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
Randomize
