i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
