she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
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