My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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