I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
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