I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
