Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
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