Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
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