I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
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