in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Randomize
