Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
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