if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
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