my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
