I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
He better not be in your backpack
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
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