You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
