I hope mine doesn't look like that
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Randomize
