Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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