I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
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