Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
Randomize
