I just pynch a tree in the face
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize
