I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
I looked at my own cervix.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
