we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
We're using joints as your birthday candles
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
and you fell through a lawn chair
Randomize
