i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize
