Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
