but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
this will be a night to untag.
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
Randomize