Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
