Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
You're earring is so big in my mouth
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
Randomize
