I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize
