people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
