i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
You made out with two different species that night
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
Randomize
