I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
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