Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
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