i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
Randomize
