the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Randomize
