yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
Just high enough for therapy.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize
