fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Randomize