I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
