they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
Randomize
