p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Randomize
