you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
Randomize
