We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
Randomize
